BUW101-ass04-1 Loss – keeping the wolf from…

Today’s assignment suggests writing about loss in anticipation of producing further posts in a series – I can’t think that far ahead at the moment with my writing.

I don’t want to write about loss, not today at least. I’m quite lost for words on the subject, or rather I’m not, but don’t fancy an outpouring of loss-related reflection.

I could write about things I’ve lost to my dog’s chewing – like my Foo Fighters CD, ‘Nothing Left to Lose’! Quite ironic.

Or I could write about how I nearly lost the dog to her swallowing a whole clipper lighter that was knocked off the worktop in the kitchen. I kept it next to the cooker to light the gas but its dark at that end of the kitchen and not seeing the lighter it got accidentally swiped onto the floor.

The dog was quite young. Usually she’d give something back for the offer of some chicken but this time she snatched the chicken while the lighter was still in her mouth and swallowed both! I’d managed to grab the metal piece of the lighter surround and that had come off in my hand but she had the rest. I didn’t have to worry about zinc poisoning at least, just butane and blocked intestines! That was so scary. So, a phone call to the emergency vets, an appointment the next day and an urgent operation to pay for.

Nowadays, lighters are banned around my house – I bought a large safety cooker lighter and will never buy a small lighter again!

There, I wasn’t going to write about loss, but I have.

Apparently dogs often swallow all kinds of things they shouldn’t, stones and other objects. I now know that if her stools ever appear black and tarry and it doesn’t resolve by the next passing that she will have an intestinal blockage and to seek urgent veterinary advice and assistance. I might have been unaware of that fact had it not have been for this mishap. There, now I’m talking shit I’ll leave it there!

BUW101-ass04-1 Loss – keeping the wolf from…

BUW101-ass01-1-freewriting

Timer set… pressured deadline? nope! pressured? nope! should be perhaps,
will be most likely… carried away with???

What will become of getting stuck for a frozen moment and then continuing to tap
away at these keys as if my life depends on meeting the challenge…which one?
how many? does it matter? are we counting? do we count yet here, there or
anywhere…?

What should I be saying? Should I even speak? Can you hear my voice? Does it
disturb or perturb you?… I’m not supposed to be editing and I’m on the wrong page,
in a notepad, but saves the cloggy cogs and wheels crashing against the
shoreline…

I’d love a day at the seaside wouldn’t you? … salty air, grey skies, chilly breeze,
but at Easter? Still more visitors, nicer when it’s bleak and abandoned and the
promenade facades have the shutters drawn down and locked. No money to spend
much so why care?

Skegness! I’ve lived here in the Midlands for over twenty years and having originated
from a coastal area elsewhere still cannot for the life of me understand Midlanders
infatuation with Skegness! bingo! arcades! cheap markets full of break-by-before
tomorrow tacky souvenirs and fall to pieces clothing…

Fish and chips by the sea with lashings of salt and vinegar…

The timer’s set and my coffee’s going cold… walk away…

…warm one hand while the other works at play… how to kill an hour’s third…

So, where to start? Where’s the beginning and why make an end?

Are you getting ready for the next 1920s style era of great British depression? Is it
a looming global doom on the horizon? Have you tried to read the legislation for
UK welfare reform? It’s the next scariest thing I’ve read to the climate change
documents – especially the chinese fella’s report that suggests by 2050 our average
indoor temperature has to be reduced to 17degrees – hell fire, some of us survive
with ten to twelve degrees indoors already in winter! Old people surv ive much better
than us younger folk, amazingly so and with far less complaining and expectation…

Halfway there almost, will I run out of steam before I run out of electric and will there
be anymore?

I’ve thought ahead as far as can I warm water in a steel pan with a glass lid to save
energy – but not in a north-facing yard that’s in shade most of the day! Vegetables
won’t grow well here either. Time to think of planning to move at some time before
next winter. My landlord’s fridge won’t operate correctly until ambient room
temperatures are above sixteen degrees and we’re not quite there enough ambiently
yet.

For the ease of any poor unfortunate reader stumbling across my stream of
consciousness drivel- well, if they’ve been before, they’ll know what to expect…

… maybe eight minutes left in this whole wide world of writing 101 prompt
response… What would you do with the last eight minutes ever? Make a call?
Watch the skies? What would I do? Would I waste it away writing as if my life
depended on it, hoping it might be discovered one day and leave a trace of (my)
being here?… and why is my stream of consciousness outpouring alouding itself
from my voice-box?

I wish my hands could keep up with my thinking… sticky old keyboard, is my
excuse, as if I need another! My best one’s upstairs on the old win98 offline bedside
hook-up – really must take my netbook to a shop and get it fixed! Something else
for the wish-list…

Five more minutes really? no, only two, having checked… what would I do with the
last two minutes in this wonderful world? Say a prayer perhaps? Perhaps sing a
song if even only in thought. Probably leave the tears to roll (not that there are any
at the moment, but there will be at some point, of course).

Fifty two seconds and counting and I’m not supposed to look at my timer but how
would I know to reach some kind of ending in time if not to look? Deep breath and
fifteen seconds is just enough to type over and out.

(700 words)

re: editing, apart from correcting typos and punctuation I’ve left my draft as the original text, although it IS tempting to add or re-work things, especially when I go off on another tangent without completing what I was trying to say! Never mind…OMG! formatting to sort now! looked fine in editor screen – that’s what I get from pasting from notepad to word-processing programme THEN to blog editor! Will I ever remember to paste only from a plain text file, NOT the word processor!

BUW101-ass01-1-freewriting